The Preliminary Rounds

Although I still feel intermittently sad about the departed Mr.Aloof, I am getting on with things. Mainly, I have put a personals ad on active on three separate sites. Two are bdsm based, and one is linked to Nerve, which should at least make the other listers at least somewhat deviant, or at least, interested in or at the very least tolerant of the deviant. So far the only responses I've had have come from my usual site, which is not particularly unexpected, but it also means there are a lot to weed out. So far, there are three of possible interest, which means, probably none. But I'll go through the exercise, if only to get myself back into the swing of things.

In the meantime, yesterday included the highlight of a particularly naughty flirt with Mr.Ball on IM at work. Apparently he's been away which is why he wasn't around to entertain me as usual on the weekend. Strange one, Mr.Ball. Not at all sure what to make of him. When we first met, I was in much the situation I am now. Perhaps slightly further along into the first rounds. But I met him right after I met Mr.Aloof. And while I liked Mr.Ball, Mr.Aloof was intriguing and mysterious... aloof even, and therefore, safe, and appealing to my non-trusting nature. Still, we got on alright, but then he had a bit of a freakout somewhat after about thinking I wanted a 'R'elationship. Which was a bit strange I thought, and unfounded, having only met once, and given the unbenknownst to him fact I was also entertaining Mr.Aloof. And it all sort of fell out from there. He made no advances, Mr.Aloof did, and the rest was somewhat history. Except....

Except that for the past year we never quite gave up chatting with flirty overtones. There was the one time since that we've met- with the undefined goodbye kiss(es) and then yesterday. How am I supposed to know what to think? I've said to tlsd in the past year, while I was involved with Mr.Aloof that Mr.Ball has always posed a strange contradiction to my pursuits. That he provides a level of discussion, understanding, and friendship that was completely absent from my interactions with Mr.Aloof. Except he is aloof in his own way, being mostly a construct of bits and bytes. The thing is, while he knows about Mr.Aloof, I know nothing of his relations, current, or in the past year. Hell, though I am pretty sure I made him tell me once, I don't even know his last name.

I don't know. It seems to me that by the enforced distance and lack of real life contact in the last year, that he's made his position somewhat clear. And the flirting is just so. Its just that it plays on my mind now, that I'm looking again. To have someone I am more familiar with, who is easy to chat to, who shares certain interests, as well as a host of others. I think I should stop thinking about it really and get back to sorting all the pending applications.