08 June 2005

Indulgent

When my boss is away I just go into total and complete slack mode. The past two days I've done so very little work. I can't believe I get paid for sitting at my desk and writing my blog. Well actually, I'm also at the same time working on a CPD for our little 'urban design' department to give to the rest of the 'architecture/landscape architecture' office. How is it I get nominated for this stuff?

I'm biding my time here for an hour before a group of us head to Regent's Park to play softball against another architecture office. I'm not sure how that became popular here. In the states, summer league softball is really popular. But it's not like this is a softball/baseball sort of country. There aren't diamonds in the parks. It's really meet up, find some open grass, and get a game on. It also usually involves lots of beer and bags of snack foods. I'll probably be the only one there who even knows how to play properly. I even brought in my own glove. *smirk* Somehow, I got nominated for organizing it this year. We have a game every Wednesday from now through August. My job is accomplished.

Tomorrow I meet up with Mr.Aloof after two months of not seeing each other. I'm nervous, and I hate that I'm nervous. Has it been too long? Lately I find we have little to say on email or IM. It's like... I don't want to talk to him, I want to BE with him. And I find that urge a bit confusing. I'm looking forward to seeing him but fear that when I do, I will still find I have nothing to say. This awkward future image makes me nervous, now. I mean, there is nothing I can do about it. I want some sort of reassurance. Some comfort. But it's not going to happen. I'm just going to have to suffer through these nerves and worries. I just want to see him and get it over with. Know if there is still anything there or not. Know if this is going anywhere or not.

And of course if all goes well there should be some naughty business going on tomorrow, and that too, is nerve inducing.

Ah well. Batter up!

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