In the Air

Men frustration. Three of them. Each with their own unique issue. Mr.Noshow, Mr.Aloof, and Mr.Ball.

Two days ago, Mr.Ball accused me of wanting a 'Relationship' (note the capital R). I should point out that Mr.Ball and I have had one face to face date, that involved getting a bit naughty on a street corner and in no way have discussed things like... what we are looking for from all this. And yet all of the sudden I am being treated warily, as though I am here to steal his soul. We have no plans to even see each other again. Shouldn't we do that before getting all freaked about what it means?

Yesterday, I got an email from Mr.Aloof. This is the first contact I have had from him in over two weeks which was one tiny text that was two weeks after having heard from him. In fact, the reality is, we have not really been in contact for four weeks and I was on the verge of deleting all email from him. Now, I am glad to hear from him, but four weeks ago things were moving forward and the fact is, he's having some sort of midlife crisis and I just don't know how I factor into that right now at all. So I guess he's around, but on hold.

And since Wednesday, when I was supposed to meet Mr.Noshow out for drinks, and he of course cancelled, I haven't heard a peep. Granted I was probably not as nice as I could have been- but after not showing up for a booty call on the weekend and in addition bagging drinks mid-week when the reality is, this is his SECOND CHANCE at everything and is coming up sorely lacking....

So what is a girl to do? Mr.Ball would have no recourse to my discussions with Mr.Noshow with whom, in better times, I discussed at great length what I was looking for. A fuck-buddy, a weekly shag, a no-strings sort of commitment from someone who can give me what I want and with whom I generally get along and have a good time. What the hell is so horrid or disturbing about that sort of offer that a guy in his right mind who professes to be looking for the same wouldn't jump on top and hang on for dear life? Or is it that they just don't believe me? Or is it that it's not actually what they're looking for? I mean, I wouldn't say no to a Relationship, if one crossed my path, but to start with? I just want some regular fun for a while. That's all. Why is it so goddamn hard to find?

In the meantime, I am getting a whole lot of grief and absolutely no nookie. It is so fucking frustrating. Three men in the air, and none in my bed. Fucking fuckity fuck.