Future Plans

Stress has led to restlessness. Or maybe the stress is on top of a certain degree of restlessness. Lately it has struck me more and more that I have been here for a while, that I have been doing the same things for some time, and that I do not want this state of being to be indefinite perhaps.

There are some considerations I have though, baggage if you like, which keeps me slightly more grounded and stuck than a completely free spirit:

- I need to work for four years in this country before I can apply for permanent residency. Permanent residency will allow me to not worry about having a work permit or visa, and I will be able to come and go as I like (to an extent) and work wherever I like. I have a year and a half to go.

- My stupid financial advisor apparently set up my mortgage with a five year early repayment penalty (even though he told me there wasn't any). I have only owned my flat for one year. Unless I wanted to make no money on it whatsoever, I really need to wait until the penalty period is finished to even consider selling. With the Olympics upcoming however, and the stable rental market in London, this is not insurmountable.

- I do however, have a lot of 'things'. If I were to try to rent my whole house, I would need to address my abundance of material possessions. Scary.

- I have student loans that need monthly repaying. Ergo, I need a set monthly income of a certain amount. Luckily, even though I owe something ridiculous like $50k, that amount is only $270/month. And with advanced preparation, this could also be managed, still, a consideration.

- I want to finish my exams. At the moment, that will take me two more years of this bullshit. But it's not at all dependent on me being here, in fact, it's something of a hindrance.

That's actually not such a difficult list. Of course there are friends, but I have friends all over. And I would be just as sad to leave the ones here behind as I have been to leave all the others, but I am at least secure knowing you can keep friends far away.

I guess what I've been thinking lately was that when I get my residency here, depending on where I'm working (but for argument sake, lets say the same office, because I'm lazy and that's likely) I could ask for a six month sabbatical. If I hadn't finished with my exams, I could spend the first couple months in the states, just getting those done and out of the way. Then, if I planned right, I could just travel and backpack and do fuck all before settling back down to work for a bit.

I guess it never occurred to me until recently that this sort of thing was an option. And I'm not entirely sure why it's occurred to me now. Perhaps because I feel sometimes I have nothing to look forward to in life except more of the same. But it doesn't all have to be the same. I'm lucky enough to be able to do exactly such a thing with enough advance preparation and planning. Still, it's not a very K-like series of thoughts in all honesty. Normally my random lifestyle has happened to me because of chance or circumstance, but not systematic advanced planning.