Stuff of the Moment

I just ate a lot of potatoes. See, last week I started on this organic box scheme thing to try and increase my fruit and vegetable intake. So far so good, and I have eaten many of the vegetables and fruit I got last week, but I didn't finish all of it and I just picked up my new stuff for this week. So I felt the need to try to eat what was left from last week which included a bunch of potatoes. They were very good, but really far too many- I turned them into sort of mashed and stuck the leftovers in the fridge. When I'm going to eat all the new fruits and vegetables is a very good question, but I'm going to try. I guess my plan is working- it really is encouraging me to eat more produce.

I got to pick up the stuff tonight because softball was canceled. Not enough players. That was disappointing. On the other hand, I was actually really busy at work so I wasn't that upset about not having to rush off to that on top of working hard. Tomorrow I will also be working hard. Which I guess is alright, but with the threat of being made redundant hanging over my head, it feels a bit like hoop jumping. I don't like working this hard if they're just about to shove it back in my face.

Speaking of which, we aren't going to find out now until next week. Isn't that nice. The Director in charge of HR casually mentioned to me that she was going on holiday tomorrow which suggested they should either let us know today, or something was up. So all three of us sent a joint email asking for a time frame at which point she came to meet with us and said they now want to wait until our boss P is back to discuss things with him. This is very not cool as far as I'm concerned. It's extremely bad management to let three people twist in the wind while they can't quite figure it out. And you know, they know who the 'one' is, so they could at least let that one person know and let the other people off the hook- even if what they let them know is that nothing is definite and they really don't want to lose them. But letting three people suffer is not right.

Tomorrow I'm hoping to go to this comedy night thing. Though the new message says it might be crowded. Unfair! Some of us have to come straight from work. It's not like 'getting there early' is really a possibility. Boo hiss.

In keeping with my trying to balance fun with despair, I've also made a new contact on IC with the hopes of being a rope bunny for a bit. It's something I've been thinking about for a while- a non-sexual interaction which allows me to indulge some of my kinky pleasures. So contact has been good so far, and this person is really good with the rope- which is exciting. I'm sure everyone (who does) has their own individual reasons for looking into such things. I recognize that part of my thinking down this route was that I wanted to replace the memories I have of Mr.Aloof and his rope work. Fortunately, or unfortunately, depending on how you look at it, Mr.Aloof was really fucking good at putting scenarios together. This was good, because it meant I got to experience things that were truly magical and fulfilling. But it's bad because he was otherwise such a complete ass to me, and now I worry that I will never find such fulfillment with anyone else.

So back to the rope, the thing is, he was pretty damn good with the rope. And I don't want for all of my fantasies or thoughts to linger back to my time with him because it was the best that I've experienced. So I am thinking of using this opportunity to replace old thoughts and sensations with new ones. It's guaranteed non-sexual which appeals to me quite a bit. It's safe but rewarding, hopefully mutually rewarding. But I'm not going to say too much more on it because it reminds me just a little bit of when I offered to let Siege photograph me, and he agreed to, and I was so very excited about the prospect, but it never came to be. I don't want this to be the same, so no more until it happens, but then if it's worth it, I'll record it here.

Last item of note is that I went swimming Tuesday morning. That was pretty cool as I haven't gone swimming for ages. But my arms and shoulders have hurt for two days. I guess this means I should do more swimming!