Waiting to Sweat

I really need to hang those curtains in my room. This time of year it is pretty much 'light' at 4am- and seeing as how I'm a morning person, it means I simply can't sleep much past 7am. Not that I really have a problem with being someone who gets up early, but it's the rest of the world who seem to find it a bit troublesome. So while I may be up and ready to go do things at this time on a Sunday morning, there isn't anything open that I can go to. Oops. Guess I'll blog to pass some time instead.

I'm heading straight to the gym this morning. Didn't go Friday or Saturday, so today is the day. I've been pretty good about going Monday-Thursday though. So if I include Sunday, that will be 5x a week. That's pretty good. As usual, I like going to the gym once I'm there. I always do. It's just keeping up that motivation to get myself to the gym. So far so good.

In other news, I have some spectacular bruises blossoming on my upper right arm from Thursday nights hijinks. I knew there would be some from the pounding- I guess they were just so deep it took a couple days to come out. Funny enough, there are also a large circle in three parts on the inside of my upper arm, that doesn't hurt at all. I guess those were from being grabbed- well, what else would it be from? So yes, my upper right arm is practically surrounded with assorted bruises like a tribal tattoo. And it pleases me greatly.

I know I've said it before and I'll say it again. I like my sexual activities rough and hard. That's just what turns me on. There is this complete and total satisfaction from the lingering ache and visible marks of interaction. I've passed the stage where I worry too much about 'what other people think' about it all. I can't help that this is how I'm wired, and I'm thankful every day that there are other people wired just like me so that I have the opportunity to feel complete.

No official word yet on my exams. Some people on the forum are saying they've gotten results from exams taken after my other exams. Does this mean all of my exams have been graded and I have only failed the one? That would clearly be ideal (though surprising because I will have failed the one exam I really thought I wouldn't). But if all I have failed is one exam, I could even fly back just for a long weekend in October and take my exam- and still go on a trip to Japan. Or Cambodia. Those were the two main options for later in the year. I just need those official letters. I need to know my results!!

I'm still really worried though, that I failed more than one. And it is hard for me- I passed all my previous exams and they were actually a lot harder. It's just that these exams are so... arbitrary. I don't actually do that well with failure being the nerd that I am. But even my nerdiest friends have failed one or more of these same exams- and I know that it doesn't mean anything. I even know that some of those same friends are jealous that I've passed as many as I have already. It still doesn't mean I particularly like it. I guess more than anything it's just that I've been hammering away on these things for three years now- taking up the majority of my vacation time, my free time (for studying) and my money. I'm pretty desperate to be done.

Still 30 minutes until the gym opens. What a pain. At least it looks like it's going to be a lovely day.