I have spent a disproportionate amount of time this week and last thinking about karma. Mostly this has been in respect to Mr.Aloof and how one of the last things I said to him was that I wished him karma (this was ostensibly in response to the fact that he 'wished me well'). The thing is, I really do wish him karma. Worse, I feel I have a vested interest in knowing that the Universe rights itself and that people who do bad things are punished.
In particular if they do bad things to me.
I was talking with someone this weekend who said something quite striking in this regard, which to paraphrase was along the lines of, "I have gone out of my way to be nice and considerate and to do the right thing. So where the fuck is my reward for being a good person?". And this is a sentiment that I agree wholeheartedly with. Though of course, I must keep reminding myself that really most aspects of my life are actually pretty swell. It is really a very narrow band of my existence, mainly my intimate relationships and my reflections upon myself that are the main issues. Which isn't too bad all things considered, life could be a lot worse.
But still, this thought plagues me. I have related it to people the past few days by saying that I feel like a small child who stamps her foot and has a tantrum saying "That's not fair!". And it's true- life isn't fair. I would have thought I learned this lesson a long time ago, but apparently it hasn't really sunk in. So instead I find I cling to this belief that bad things must happen to people who treat others badly. Unfortunately, I am not entirely convinced that this is the case, so I fall into somewhat obsessive behavior of following people I have known in the past to... what? To somehow find out that they get their just reward.
So odd I suppose that while this topic is hot on my mind, not one but two examples of what could be construed as karmic retribution have been brought to my attention.
The first is a very old ex-friend of mine. I dare say at this point we have been 'not friends' for as long as we were friends and if I say I knew her for eight years, that should give you some idea. At any rate, I have checked her out online from time to time and last year at some point became aware that she was on Facebook. Well I knew there was no chance in hell she would friend me, so instead I got S to friend her which she accepted. I think she worked things out fairly quickly however, and while S tried to engage her in conversation she went quiet. Which wasn't entirely unexpected. But on the other hand, she never unfriended S. So this past week, S informs me that my ex friend removed the relationship status portion of her profile which would be the bit where she says she's married. This isn't something you accidentally do. And when I considered the possibilities of her no longer being married, I felt that perhaps karma had come to visit my old friend, and I felt... vindicated. Of course, it may be nothing at all, but one can hope.
The second incident was a bit closer to home as some unfortunate karma came back to my father. The thing is, while I know that he is all worked up about the injustice being done to him, the fact is, he has made a habit of cheating the system and trying to get away with things. While he would never accept this most recent circumstance as his just reward for such behavior, I can't help but think it myself. He has not behaved in a fair or considerate manner and karma has returned to him.
And so I wonder what it might be that the Universe is trying to tell me. Every now and then I think there are messages in the coincidence. Since retribution for Mr.Aloof has been high on my mind, it seems slightly unusual that two examples of retribution both known to me, were revealed this particular week at this particular time. I think the Universe is telling me to trust it. That people reap what they sow. Even if it takes a long time, it comes around eventually.
Or as another friend said to me, perhaps he will just come back in his next life as an abused child or something.
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6 comments:
The idea of reward and punishment for good/bad behaviour is something I have been pondering, fairly aimlessly, recently. As an newly activated atheist I have been reading various church leaders warning that by rejecting religious beliefs people are putting themselves in a moral vacuum.
The idea being that if you don’t have the carrot of heaven or the stick of hell then you will automatically revert to an immoral animal.
In my opinion if an atheist does good it is because they are a good person whereas if a religious person does good it is because they are angling for a decent seat in the afterlife.
Bloody hell. Far too deep for this time on a Thursday morning. I'll go back to lurking now.
thechangingman
tcm- I think the merit of 'the golden rule' is not particularly religious. If you do not treat others in a way in which you would like to be treated, then you descend into a life of paranoia and mistrust which seems like a very unpleasant life indeed. There is also some vague notion that if we all were to just use and abuse each other, surely we would fail to thrive and it would be the end of us.
Still, the concept of karma is really about the concept of vengeance or retribution which I think are possibly less savory characteristics, yet something needs to justify the above belief, even if it's sensible. It is unfair to think that people who do bad things are simply happy and benefit from their mistreatment of others. And yet...
-K
K - I think that the idea, and more importantly the feel or emotion, of good and bad are a Darwinian tool to balance the selfish individual preservation instinct. We have an instinct to preserve and continue life through our individual survival but also through our group (family/tribe/species) survival.
As an individual we prosper by being selfish (bad?) but as a species we prosper by being altruistic (good?).
I think religion and karma are both attempts to rationalise these instincts and encourage “good” behaviour. Some people are selfish, bad and very happy. Some are unselfish, good and unhappy. You find the balance (morality?) that suits you and makes you as happy as you’re ever going to be.
Some bastards prosper. Some paragons of virtue get shat on. As to whether that’s fair…I think fairness is a point of view, not an absolute.
thechangingman.
tcm - Fairness and morality are, in reality, points of view. But in my world, I like to think that my world view is of course the best. I suppose that's the selfish gene talking.
Still, I have no compassion for those I view as wrongdoers. In the olden days I think I would have made a good executioner. As long as I agreed with the judgment. Scary huh?
And also, obviously a key component of my person as I discussed it before here:
http://snarkylicious.blogspot.com/2005/06/justice.html
-K
Cow has had an unfortunate run of luck lately and has pondered this very question.
Did she, in some previous life, do something horrible? Is this payback/karma? Is it because she doesn't go to church? Is the universe trying to tell her something? Something like: don't try anything, anything at all, or I will smack you down and make you sorry?
Cow would really like to believe in retribution but wonders. Are some people just charmed, by being born with money for instance? And others aren't and are just unlucky no matter what they do?
Mooing softly in confusion
topiary cow- Well, one could suggest my bad luck of the week before was some sort of karmic evening of the score, and perhaps it's true. While I joked about it however, I don't think it's right for karma to settle up in your next life.
It's a pickle. I think I'd be much happier flaying someone with a barbed whip while saying everything I wanted to say to them until they either a) accepted responsibility for their actions and repented or b) died. I'm afraid I have to settle for karma as the next best thing and to keep me from my homicidal tendencies.
On the plus side, bad things pass. Has it come in three? Mine came in three. And things are a little more bearable every day.
-K
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