Top of the List

It seems to me that I need to come up with a name for P. Perhaps I'm jumping the gun a bit, but I feel he may be here for a little while at least. Still, I'm not sure a true name has presented itself yet. I'm toying with possibilities, but none seem to fit quite right, so I guess he'll just stay P for now.

We had our second date last night, which was cool. Met up by London Bridge as I'd had a meeting in the afternoon at the GLA, so that worked out well. Conversation with him is very easy. Which is a good sign. I never feel like I'm struggling to fill conversation gaps, or we are running out of things to say. In a way it's strange because I think that it surprises me in person how we get on, since our email/text exchanges are sometimes a bit short. But you know, change is a good thing.

Last week I was talking to D&V about SA and relationships. I was commenting that I keep urging him to make a list of ten things that he would want from a potential partner and not to get seriously involved with anyone who doesn't hit say, six of those things. He has a history you see, of ending up with people that are particularly unsuited to him. D&V turned the tables on me however and said, "Well then, what's your list?" I guess I should have seen that coming. To be honest my list isn't all that long. But top of my list is someone who actually wants to be with me. I know that sounds obvious, but I keep ending up with people who seem to have a 'take it or leave it' attitude. I always seem to be the one that's pursuing, and I want that more equal rather than one sided.

So this morning I'm talking to D about the date last night and how it went and I think I said something along the lines of, "...and he seems to think I'm interesting which I guess is a good thing." to which D replied, "Well, if they say stuff along those lines it's a sign they're interested in you... hey! Top of the list!!"

Yeah, but it completely freaks me out! I know I said it's the top of the list, but it doesn't mean I'm comfortable with it presented to me right up front. Still, I know it's really early to make any distinctions, and I tend to hold back and be reticent about these things anyway, but it does seem to be going surprisingly well so far. As long as my complete craziness and stubbornness and quirkiness don't descend and ruin everything.... well, it's always a risk.

I really just don't know what to make of any of this. But I'm happy I seem to be keeping my usual insanity generally under control. Suppose the only thing to do is go along and see what happens...