Slow

This week is going to kill me. I can't believe that it's only Tuesday. It's like something huge happened and then somehow it's like it didn't happen at all and I'm locked into the same dreary routine. I can understand now, why people tend to split aspects of their personalities, to compartmentalize things. Because when everything spills over it just becomes something of a jumbled mess.

Sitting is just tolerable today. I guess I should be thankful that between the two of them, no one had particularly good aim to be hitting me square and centered. Instead most of my soreness and bruising is on my hips. So really, as long as I sit very very still, I hardly notice it. I took some time this morning to peer at all the marks in the mirror. The outline of the belt is perfectly visible in numerous red and purple locations. My hidden secret. I just have to make sure I keep wearing long tops until I'm sure nothing would be revealed accidentally by my turning or moving about. I dislike the idea of upsetting someone for no reason. And I do know people don't understand. Even people who generically understand can be unsettled by seeing the actual physical results.

Things at work trickle on. I had my review which seemed to go well, but of course the outcome is uncertain. I have to wait and see if they follow through on things discussed or not, and in a reasonable time frame. Otherwise it's all just lip service. But I guess I'm glad it's over, and I'm glad it generally went well.

I guess there is nothing very pressing at the moment. Work is easing into a conclusion for this massive project. I have a trip to Germany in a few weeks, but that's still a few weeks. And there just isn't anything else in the schedule. Maybe that lends itself to this feeling of languor. Or maybe it's hormones. It's time for hormones again. Any day now I expect to go fully batshit crazy.