Tomorrow I Test

Well, I am sick to death of studying for my test tomorrow. Not the least of which reason being that I am not getting it. My five hour test tomorrow consists of two problems. One is one hour, and one is four hours. The one hour problem I feel reasonably okay about, but everyone says that it really uses up all of the time and it can be a push. So I'm not looking forward to it because it is first, and it is clearly going to be stressful. And of course I'm worried that I will not finish in time. My first practice sample took over two hours. The second I did better- it was more like 45. Still, since I keep using the same materials, was I actually getting better or just getting used to the problem and it's quirks? Questionable.

The second problem is more difficult. And I'm fairly frustrated that it's not coming together for me very well. This is the one problem that is highlighting how little architecture I've been doing these past bunch of years, and how I'm not used to doing what I'm being asked to do. My brain is just not clicking in to it. So I'm concerned. I have never felt this unsure going into any of the previous 8 exams.

Of course, most people I know have failed at least one exam. Many people I know have failed more than one exam. And some people I know have failed the same exam more than once. So truthfully.... if I pass the first two that I took last week and the week before, and I fail this one... well... it's hardly the end of the world. I have six months to wait and then I'm eligible to take it again. Of course I wasn't planning on coming back home again this year, so if this is what happens, I will need to reconsider my travel plans for later on. Which would also be unfortunate, but not the end of the world. It's hard to consider though, that I may have to go through this all again.

Still, it's a bit early for that sort of thinking. I have the rest of tonight and tomorrow morning to keep going over it all. Once it's done, it's done- and I'll have done the best I could have at this point. I will deal with the future, when the future arrives.