And Relax

Well, sort of. For the most part. December 10th has now come and gone and with it the last bit of major work that I needed to concern myself with this year. The workshop seemed to go very well. There were a lot of important and knowledgeable people there who seemed to really get into what we were asking them to do. There were a couple of small glitches, but mostly things that I noticed, because I am a perfectionist and because I am actually reasonably good at this sort of stuff, I notice when people don't do as well or don't do what they should have done. But it didn't negatively impact the day in particular, and so in general I would say it went well.

I was exhausted going home- I feel fast asleep on the bus. I mean, I often fall asleep on the bus but I wouldn't have been surprised if I was snoring or something this time. I was really out of it and did the whole 'jerk awake' thing a couple of times.

This morning my cough seems a bit worse for all the talking I've been doing lately, and my back and neck are sort of hurting (though this is probably more from doing exactly what I'm doing now- typing on the sofa as opposed to sitting in a good chair). But really I'm looking at a significant portion of down time until mid-January when I need to kick off with my own work and research now, which I'm really very excited about (though somewhat intimidated by).

This past week on Wednesday I also had my second meeting as 'Director of Studies' with my three students on the Master's course at Cambridge. Those went very well and I was flattered because all three of the students reported that in discussion with other students on the course, they all felt I was the best DoS and also supervisor that anyone had. That made me feel very good. Who wouldn't like validation for the work that they do? But in particular I do think that after the PhD I want to look into teaching more and it's this sort of thing that makes me feel like that's exactly the right decision. I know I won't be ideal for every student, and there will always be students who don't like me, or don't get what I'm trying to tell them. But in general if the feedback is positive, then that will help me overcome my tendency to fixate on 'bad things'. At any rate, right now I feel very good about it because all I got was positive feedback so that made me happy.

Amusingly this experience was contrasted by having a big argument on the same day with A who is the other PhD student that started when I started. We were discussing the information for the workshop and he had undertaken one of the major exercises and we were going through it and I was pointing out a few things I would change. Everything I point out to him he argues with me about. I wanted to be like, "Look. I've done probably over 100 consultations, workshops, stakeholder meetings, or professional meetings with diverse professional people IN THIS INDUSTRY and I think I know what wording works best and what doesn't, and how to put together a handout." But I didn't, because that would have been incredibly bitchy and probably not received well. But honestly. It's entirely obvious that he feels a need to 'prove' that we are equal, but I'm ten years older than him and have worked substantially, so while we are equal in the PhD sense, we are certainly not equal in the life experience sense and I really wish he'd recognize that sometimes instead of always arguing with me.

Also, when someone argues with me like that about something I am sure about, I don't back down either. So it becomes a very useless exercise. I did keep saying to him that I didn't want to discuss it and we needed to call the third person (who I knew he would listen to) but he just kept hammering on about it so I kept deflecting. It was just overall, very annoying. But I'm really not sure how else to deal with him as I'm certainly not going to let him have has own way, especially when it is anything that is going to have my name attached to it, and I think he's completely and utterly wrong.

In boy land there isn't too much of interest going on. Little jackrabbit is off in Columbia, though he did send me an email so that was nice. I also have been sitting on a huge annoyance at Econ so I sent him a text last night which only said 'nudge' but was enough to kick off a text conversation and plans to meet up next week and maybe the week after. I probably shouldn't have done that in the sense that, I should find a way to just let him drop off. But I knew that he'd be in touch at some point anyway so it's no good to try and let someone go when they just pop up again unless it's more finished in my opinion. So whatever. I don't hope for anything from him in particular, and I do enjoy his company, and if we meet up maybe I will tell him off for being so crap about things. But we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

Later tonight I'm going to Volupte for a friend's birthday. What I really need to do is go get a dress for that because I don't have anything to wear. That was my original plan for today- dress shopping. But right now I"m relaxing on the sofa as I can't stand the thought of the holiday crowds. Where can I go shopping with good selection which is not Oxford Circus? Need to think.